A Crowe's Song Page 20

  I wanted to listen to his every word, though I found it somewhat difficult when I came across information cards I really wanted to ask about. I didn’t want to appear rude by interjecting, but I found it impossible to control myself when I noticed a card titled: A Crow’s Song. “What does this mean?”

  Considering he knew every piece of information posted in here by heart, he glanced up to see what I was referring to, not needing to read anything to know what facts to tell. “Have you ever heard that the term for a bird’s call is their song? Well, it just explains their song…if that’s what you want to call it. Personally, I think it’s misleading, but my dad won’t let me revise it.”

  I moved closer, intrigued and wanting to know more, but at the same time, I didn’t want to read about it. I wanted Drew to explain it to me. “Why do you want to change it? What’s wrong with it?”

  “Because this so-called song is a rather horrible sound. I don’t even think it can be called a squawk; most people refer to it as a cry, because that’s what it sounds like. I wouldn’t be surprised if people have heard it and thought someone was dying.”

  Well, that wasn’t what I expected to hear, especially since the card described it completely differently. As he moved around, emptying trash and replacing the bags in the bins, I skimmed the information he claimed was incorrect.

  It stated that a crow’s song could be heard by its tribe, even from far away, as a means of protecting their own. And at the very bottom, it explained that they were known to represent home and family, awareness and safety. There was something about that description that hit me like a smack in the face.

  No, it was more like a punch in the gut.

  A crow uses its voice, its song, to communicate with its family members from far away. And his grandmother opened this place to reach family members who were far away. It made me wonder how much of the details of this place were coincidental, and how much had been carefully considered by Drew’s grandmother.

  “Not sure if you’re aware, but a group of crows is called a murder, just like a group of fish is a school,” he said, pulling me from the depths of my thoughts. He continued to explain while dusting the furniture in the main part of the room. “Anyway, it has been called that for hundreds of years, though no one truly knows why. Some believe it got its name from their cry—which, as I’ve said, closely resembles someone screaming in pain or fear.”

  “It says here they communicate over great distances.”

  He glanced at me, likely wondering if I’d meant that as a question or was simply telling him what his own information card said. To be honest, I wasn’t even sure how I meant it. All I knew was that I was confused.

  “Yeah, think about it…their screams are so awful and loud that they travel quite far. Which is great if you’re part of their tribe, not so great if you’re outside trying to enjoy the peacefulness of nature.”

  I couldn’t help giggling under my breath at that. The visual of Drew hanging out in the forest for no other reason than to listen to nature was comical. “What do you mean by being part of their tribe? I assume it’s not like a dog whistle, so wouldn’t all animals be able to hear it?”

  “Each family has their own dialect, kind of like how we all have different accents depending on where we’re from. So when they hear it, they know if it’s a bird from their tribe or not. It’s actually pretty fascinating. When they join another tribe, they pick up their dialect.”

  “Any reason they’re so loud then?”

  “Well, I would assume it has something to do with how territorial they are. If they’re defending what’s theirs, it only makes sense that the louder they are, the scarier they sound to whatever they’re trying to run off. But on top of that, they also use their voices to send out messages to their tribe—be it a warning or cry for help.”

  I hummed and leaned against the wall with my shoulder. So much of what I’d learned today connected on some level to the stories he’d told me about the family who’d gone missing from the lost town below the lake. I could only pass so much off as coincidence before I started questioning the intent of the names that his grandmother and dad had used for the resort. But I didn’t want to ask about it. I didn’t want Drew to think I was crazy for connecting dots that weren’t meant to be connected—or for making something out of absolutely nothing.

  Instead, I settled on a more neutral question. “You know weather, natural disasters, and birds. Is there anything you don’t know, Drew?”

  “Probably. I’ll let you know when I find it,” he said with a coy smirk and a wink.

  He finished his to-do list, took the trash to the back—where I assumed the big bins were—and put the cleaning products away; then he returned to the main room. Although, rather than continue to look around at the displays and glass cases, I sat on the worn leather couch and waited for him to return. I had entirely way too much on my mind after that last bit about their cries. Or screams or squawks or songs, whatever they were called.

  “Everything all right?” Drew asked, taking a seat next to me.

  His voice was enough to snap me out of my trance, but his scent was enough to put me in a completely different one. “Yeah, just waiting on you to finish.”

  “Why? Are you done looking around?”

  “I’ve already seen it all.” That was a lie, but I knew if I’d told him otherwise, he’d probably walk me all around the room, and I didn’t think I had the mental capacity for that today. So instead, I told him I’d checked everything out before he showed up. It was believable enough.

  However, rather than get up to leave, he remained seated next to me, as if we were in his living room instead of the main house. I mean, it wasn’t a bad place, quite nicely put together, but it didn’t have the same warmth as his place. Then again, I doubted being alone with him anywhere other than a public area would be a good idea. That thought alone made me wonder if that was his reason for staying here.

  “Did you know I was going to be here?” he asked, leaning against the back of the couch as if getting comfortable for a long stay. “I know we made plans to hang out after I finished work, but I can’t remember if I told you that I had to clean here or not.”

  “No, you didn’t tell me. I was just killing time before you got done with work. I assumed you’d be doing office stuff or fixing someone’s toilet.”

  He scrubbed his palm down his face, hiding his smile. “Not today.”

  “I take it that means you didn’t know I was here, either?” When he shook his head, I decided to go for it. “Are we staying here to avoid a repeat of last night?”

  I realized how that sounded—as though I were hoping for round three—but rather than try to correct it, I ignored it and the familiar heat burning my cheeks. Not to mention, knowing my luck, if I tried to explain my reason for asking, I’d likely make it worse. I’d learned a long time ago to just leave things alone.

  This time, it was his face that turned red. Well, with his complexion, it was more of a bronze than a blush. Whatever the color, the sight made my stomach do backflips and my heart vibrate with an undeniable attraction. “I don’t know, Kenny. Is that what we’re doing?”

  “Don’t turn it back on me. You’re the one who sat down instead of making a move to leave.”

  “Nah, I just wanted to hear the story of how you lost your virginity, and I figured it might be more comfortable to have that conversation here instead of at my place or yours. But if you would rather have it at—”

  “No…” I practically shouted before getting my reaction under control. “I mean, here’s fine. We can leave after we finish discussing the single most embarrassing thing about myself.”

  He slowly lifted his hand to caress my cheek and studied me with careful eyes. “Why do you say it’s embarrassing?”

  His obvious concern ignited something deep within me, buried in the very center of my chest—a confidence and strength I never knew existed. Yet the sincerity in his voice and honesty in his eyes did more than r
each into my chest to find suppressed courage. It swam in my soul, answering questions I hadn’t yet asked. Solving problems I hadn’t yet discovered. The smooth authenticity that glided through his tone rocked me into a comfortable state of acceptance so a few more pieces of our puzzle could fall into place.

  In the short amount of time I’d been at the resort, Drew had managed to sharpen my edges and strengthen my core. At the same time, it seemed that I offered him a softness he’d never had a purpose for before me. We complimented each other very well, and this wasn’t the first time I’d recognized it. However, this was the first time that its impact was strong enough to provoke such a severe reaction within me.

  I wanted to avoid the question, offer a blanket response, anything other than be vulnerable by speaking the truth. But I couldn’t. The courage he’d gifted me wouldn’t allow it. So instead, I sat up a little higher, held his stare, and exhaled. “I’d dated this guy in high school, and after two years, I guess he thought it had been long enough, and it was time to take things to the next level. I wasn’t interested, which pissed him off.”

  “Wait, Kenny…” He held my hand in my lap and leaned closer. “If you’re about to tell me that someone took something that wasn’t theirs to take, please stop now, because I think I might go into a murderous rage if that happened.”

  I hadn’t once considered how my explanation would’ve sounded and immediately panicked. “Oh, no. It’s nothing like that. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you think that’s where I was going with it.”

  “No, you’re okay. It’s fine. I just got worried, that’s all. Please, continue.”

  Without letting go of his hand—he hadn’t let go of mine either—I turned more to face him and exhaled once again. “Needless to say, he broke up with me. Technically, it was more of a mutual decision, but he’s the one who pulled the plug first. Anyway, this all took place right before senior year…less than a month before school started again. So imagine my surprise when I find him walking the halls with Hazel Wilcox, the self-proclaimed master of oral.”

  Strangely enough, it wasn’t embarrassing to talk about. It was actually quite easy.

  Then again, I hadn’t gotten to the virginity part yet.

  “It bothered me, but more than anything, it showed me what type of guy he was. Then his supposed friend started talking to me. I say supposed because they had been best friends since kindergarten, yet his friend didn’t have many nice things to say about him. He basically acted like the knight in shining armor who came to save me after having my heart broken. He just couldn’t believe that someone would dump me simply because I wasn’t ready to lose my virginity.”

  “Ah…” Drew nodded with a growing smile on his lips. “I think I know where this is going. Did the friend make you think he was the good guy and then use that to get in your pants? Well, I should say try.”

  “Yeah, that’s exactly what happened. Is it a common thing for guys to do?”

  “I’ve never known anyone who’s done that, but I’ve heard of it happening.”

  Oddly enough, that made me feel better. Granted, it had all happened nearly a year ago, so it wasn’t something that bothered me too much anymore, but it was still a source of anger for me.

  “Well, based on what you said last night, I take it you didn’t give it up to him either.”

  “Correct,” I said with dramatic enthusiasm, as if he’d guessed an impossible question. “I found out that he had some stupid bet with his friend—my ex—about whether or not he could get me to have sex with him. I guess he thought he could, and my ex said it wouldn’t happen. As much as I hated that my ex won the bet, being the one who turned them both down made it more than worth it.”

  “And that’s when you decided to take matters in your own hands?” he asked, repeating my words from last night.

  I dropped my chin and shook my head, humored by his eagerness to get to the juicy bits. “In a nutshell, yes. Apparently, it wasn’t just about getting me to sleep with them; it was mostly about being the one to deflower me. That’s what pissed me off more than anything. They didn’t see me as a person; all they saw was a hymen that needed breaking. So I did the one thing that would keep anyone from ever claiming that title…I made sure that no one could ever go after my virginity again.”

  For whatever reason, I assumed there would be a hint of disgust or maybe disapproval on his face. Yet there was nothing other than excitement that resembled pride lining his features and shining in his eyes.

  It made no sense; he didn’t have a reason to be proud of me. “Why do you look so happy?”

  “I don’t know. I just have this immense sense of…something inside. It makes me want to find those assholes and laugh in their faces.”

  Something about his reaction made me pause. “Why, though? Because I slept with you?”

  Drew’s eyes widened, shock embedded in his entire expression from his raised brows to his gaping mouth. “No, not at all, Kenny. That thought never entered my mind.” He scooted closer and held my face in both hands, squaring his eyes with mine. “I swear, my reaction and thoughts had nothing to do with last night and everything to do with you taking ownership of that right. You truly amaze me, McKenna.”

  I’m pretty sure my breathing completely stopped. He hadn’t called me by my real name ever. Even when I’d corrected him that first night. So to hear him say it was quite a shock. However, it also proved something else—I preferred Kenny. I liked that he was the only person in the world who called me that.

  “Good, then. That makes it even because you amaze the shit out of me with how you seem to know everything about everything. I’m in complete awe of you, Drew. I hope you know that.” I had more to say, but he silenced me with his mouth. Then his tongue.

  And I wasn’t stupid enough to argue with that.

  Chapter Fifteen

  February 16th, 1975

  Dear Diary,

  I’ve just spent the last several hours at Lower Creek with AC…and I haven’t been able to keep a smile off my face since. Mom keeps asking me what happened, because my excitement is obvious. I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy. AC and I talked about what will happen once Chogan is evacuated. I can’t say much other than I’ve never been this excited about the future! The next four and a half months will be torture, but it’ll all be worth it in the end.

  Emily hadn’t made it to the riverbank before regretting her decision not to change her outfit before leaving the house. Other than her heavy coat, she was still in the same clothes she’d worn to church that morning. Her long skirt might’ve been meant for cold days, but it didn’t do much to keep the winter breeze from prickling her legs.

  Andy sat a few feet from the river to avoid errant spray—the temperature of the air didn’t pair too well with the frigidness of the water. He hadn’t been there long, but based on the amount of leaves he’d chopped up with the small scissors on his Swiss Army pocketknife, it looked like he’d been there much longer.

  As she approached, he continued to cut away at a dead leaf rather than find her over his shoulder like he’d done every time for the last six months. She’d grown used to the infectious grin that would spread across his face when he noticed her coming, so she found it strange that he kept his head down this time. Granted, they had seen each other an hour ago at church, and it was possible he hadn’t heard her over the rushing water—she ran through all the possibilities to keep her nerves from getting the best of her.

  When Emily sat next to him, he held out a leaf he’d cut into the shape of a heart. “Here you go, I made this just for you.”

  “Oh, how romantic…a brown heart with a hole in the middle,” she teased with a nervous giggle, though she inwardly celebrated the gesture. Glancing around, Emily noticed the scene was a little different than usual; something was missing, which increased her worry that something was amiss. “You didn’t bring your fishing pole today.”

  Andy shook his head, keeping his eyes set on the earth between
his legs with his arms propped lazily on his bent knees. It was casual, especially the way he sat with his spine curved and his shoulders hunched forward. Except, he felt anything but casual.

  Something was off; she could feel it, but she didn’t know what it was…or what it could be. She was scared to ask, worried that he’d give her an answer she didn’t want to hear, but she wasn’t the type of person to ignore the elephant in the room. Her parents hadn’t raised her to sweep things under the rug. In fact, they had taught her to face a situation head-on at the onset of a problem.

  So that’s exactly what she did. “What’s up with you?”

  He turned his head slightly to the side, away from her, and scratched his neck, just beneath his jawline. Then he dropped his chin before swinging his attention her way. There was a dullness to his eyes that intensified the ripple of worry in Emily’s chest. Whatever he had to say, she wouldn’t like it.

  He shifted on his bottom to face her better. “I saw Bobby the other day.”

  That didn’t surprise her as much as it confused her. It was a relatively small town, so the chances of the two running into each other were rather high. The confusing part was why it seemed to bother him so much. The only thing she could think of was that Bobby had said something about her that might’ve scared him off.

  “And…?” she pressed.

  “He told me that the reason Brenda left town was because she was pregnant…with my baby.” That news had tied his insides into knots, similar to what it did to Emily just now. “Apparently, she was worried about what it would look like, or what people would say…or what I would do. So she went to him for help.”

  “I don’t understand, why would she want or need his help?”

  Andy licked his bottom lip before clamping it between his teeth while he thought about the answer Bobby had given him. “He said she wanted to get an abortion, but she didn’t have the money for it, and she didn’t want to get it done around here.”